Wordless Wednesday: Halloween 2011

Trelawney & Hermione's dad

I actually dressed up for Halloween this year for the first time in at least 10 years.  I went as Professor Trelawney and had a blast.  My husband humored me by wearing a name tag which read, "Dr. Wendell Wilkins." 

When I rounded the Goat Rodeo up in the yard to take pictures, I had my middle daughter (aka Luna) take a few pictures of the husband and me, since we're always the ones behind the camera.  She complained that her father stuck his tongue out in one photo, so then we both felt compelled to make faces at her.  I think this is our new favorite picture of the two of us.  I may need to work this into our New Year cards.  

Nothing says, "Happy New Year," quite like this:

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Wordless Wednesday

You know you're a potterhead...

You know you're a Potterhead when, while you're working on your son's Harry Potter Halloween costume, he points his wand at you and yells, "Stupify," but before he can finish, you point your butter knife (which you're using to try to pry the monster eyeballs out of gag glasses so that he can use them for Harry's glasses) and yell, "Protego," before he can finish.

And he freezes.

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Wordless Wednesday: Happy Grandparents' Day

This past Sunday was Grandparents' Day.  We were lucky enough to have my parents out for a visit.  This gem was captured during that visit.

My daughter is up to something.  My father is exhausted.

My mother was asleep on the other end of the couch.  Unfortunately, she's a much lighter sleeper and woke every single time I tried to snap a picture.  

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Wordless Wednesday

New Keyboards and Funny Penis-related Stories

Look, ma, no gibberish.  I am the proud new owner of one of those new-fangled keyboards.  You know the type, the super expensive wireless type complete with all letters, numbers, and punctuation.  This is a big improvement over the last insanely expensive wireless variety that lacked all that other exciting and essential stuff.

The lack of U's and H's made it impossible to type in my URL or even write my own name.  Of course, I was H-less on Harry Potter's birthday, so I got to wish a "appy birtday to arry Potter."  Apparently, when a keyboard is destroyed by water, it develops Hagrid's accent.

Now that I have the entire collection of letters, numbers and punctuation at my fingertips, I can share this story which manages to be both penis-related and funny.

Our children, like every other child who has come before them, like to repeat inappropriate things...loudly...in mixed company.

My husband was giving the two youngest a bath this weekend when our son (who never shuts the hell up is very talkative) felt compelled to ramble on about his penis.  The majority of the conversation/monologue is lost from my memory, the end, however, is a different story.

The 5-year-old announced, "(blah blah blah; stuff and nonsense)...but I just have a kid-sized penis because I'm a kid.  Not Daddy, though.  He's a grownup, so he has a big penis.  Daddy, your penis is THIS big." (said while holding his hands quite a wide distance apart)

At that point, I heard my husband tell him, "Now THAT you're allowed to repeat anywhere and everywhere you want."

It was at this point that I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe.

te goat rodeo and te case of te missing letters

do yo notice someting missing?  does tis post ave a certain, "je ne sais qoi?"  Maybe it's more like, "Je ne sais qoi in te world yo're trying to say."

earlier tis week, kids spilled water on my keyboard.  My entire first two rows don't work along wit a few letters and nearly all pnctation.  

It's an expensive wireless Mac keyboard, so we can't jst pick a replacement p at te trift store.  I oped it wold dry ot and save me sixty dollars on a new one, bt anyone wo tries to read tis disaster realizes tose letters and nmbers appear to ave taken a permanent vacation.

O yes, tis is te glamoros life of a blogger.  

An open letter to the former owners: WTF?

Dear Former Owners,

Why?  Please explain to me the thought process that went into your color choices for the humble abode which is now ours?  Cranberry red?  Really?  Why?  And why in the world is one wall in the front room that monstrosity of red while the other two are puke green (I swear that really must be the official name of the paint)?

What is the name of the demon who possessed you to paint the ENTIRE DINING ROOM in that awful dark red?  I would like to send him a firmly worded letter (full of expletives).  Nothing says, "Let's enjoy this delicious dinner together with our lovely family" quite like walls that look as though they're drenched in blood.

SIX FREAKING COATS OF PAINT is what it took to cover just one of those red walls (including 2 coats of primer).

This entire house has me wandering around asking, "What were they thinking?"  So please, do tell, what WERE you thinking?

Moose?  Really?  Why?

I want a 2 page essay explaining the motivation behind these firmly attached horrors.

Please explain your love affair of the ugliest shades of green and peach.  It is not 1987.  CUT THAT OUT.

Baffled,
the New Owners
who will be painting for the next three months to cover these horrid colors

P.S.  Our sincerest thanks for taking that awful ceiling fan with antlers with you.

ETA:
The infamous antler fan (at least a portion of it) at the top of this photograph.

Please note: don't blame me for the furniture or colors.  Those are all the fault of the former owners.

It was actually far worse than it appears in this shot.  There were even MORE antlers than you can see in this shot and there was a large log replica at the base against the ceiling.   Um...ah...no!  

AKA

Mama's Losin' It has a cute video blog today about how the title of her blog came to be.

That got me thinking.  What would some good alternative titles be for my little corner of the interwebz?

Here's what I've come up with thus far.  Feel free to jump in and add your 2 cents.

I remember one friend of mine suggested, "Laughing at the Library," because we would live at the library if they let us.  I was only half-joking when I told friends that librarians are like Pokemon for my kids.  The last time my kids walked in to the children's library and saw a new librarian at the desk, my son turned to his sisters and said, "Look, there's a new one.  YES!"  My kids collect children's librarians.

A friend once had Weird Al and Kate Winslet's song (Yes they did), "I Need A Nap," as my ring tone for me because I use that phrase all too often.  So there's an option.

Here are some more:

There's Not Enough Coffee In the World

Lorelai Gilmore's quotation is oh so accurate, "Oh, I can't stop drinking the coffee. If I stop drinking coffee, I stop doing the standing and the walking and the words putting-into-sentence doing. " Yet it's a bit lengthy for a title, don't ya think?

Coffee NOW! (If you're not sensing a theme, you're not paying attention)

Sexually Deprived For Your Freedom

Oy Vey, That Boy!

Queen Of The Freaking Internet (this is a close second to my current title)

Yeah, They're All Mine and Yes, We Did That On Purpose


Children Aren't Meant to Come In Pairs


What Part Of "Jewish" Do You Not Understand?


1 Minute Apart (for all those who look at our twins and ask in a judgmental tone, "How close in age ARE they?")


My Dignity Was Delivered With the Placenta


Keebler Elf-sized (I'm tiny)


Yay Rum!  


Now, tell me, which one's your favorite?  What would you have named this blog?

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Translation For Kindergarteners

Often, there are subtleties in the language of adults which are lost on younger children.  Compiling a collection of these and providing translations for children would prove endlessly useful.

Here is my submission for today:

If, in the middle of the very long story you were just telling your mother, she says, "Hang on, hun, I need to run to the bathroom,"  what she means is, "Wait there and hold that thought until I return."  

It does NOT mean:

"Keep talking.  Follow right behind me.  Stand outside the bathroom door and continue your story, only do so in a screaming voice to be absolutely certain she heard you."  

Now you know and knowing is half the battle.

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Your Life Story In Six Words

I know about this six word memoir concept: you summarize your life in six words.  Today, I saw one where the authors summarized their love lives.

I love that idea (and some of those answers).

I want to try my hand at it, but not only for love lives, but for childhood, friendship, parenting and all sorts of things of the sort.

The problem is, I have no freaking clue where to even begin.  I do my best thinking when allowed to just ramble to myself, so I'll do exactly that now.  Come along for this schlep through the joy and wonder that is my mind.

I can take a stab at the parenting one using my favorite piece of advice to give new parents.  If I was to follow Amy Chuah's lead, I wouldn't title my parenting memoir, Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Mother (which actually works for this as it IS six words).  Mine would be something more along the lines of;

Research Research Research Then Follow Heart


With Each Child, World Begins Anew 


They Need More Than Mere Survival 
I've often had that thought when people say, "I XYZed and my kids survived."

Nothing You Can't Do Without Help


and for humorous books on the topic:


Our Mom Doesn't Need Your Advice


These Boobs Are Made For Squirting

Here's what I have for the six-word summary of my religious views:

I'm G-d's Wrestling Partner Not Cheerleader.  


Justice Justice Shall You Pursue Always
Forgive me for putting words in G-d's mouth.  I had to add a word there to get it up to 6.

Act Justly, Love Mercy, Wrestle G-d 
This is a mix of two religious texts.


Yes, I do so love the idea of wrestling with G-d.  


Again, as for the humor book, maybe something along the lines of:

Never Met Italian Jews?  We exist.
I could trade out Italian with Dutch or Irish as well.  Most people seem to know that French Jews exist, so I could leave that one out.  


As far as my childhood, the first one that pops into my head is related to my teenage years,

Cut It Out! Not that Bad.

Oh yeah, I was a little emo one (before "Emo" was a word).

As far as love life...hmmm...

I find myself scouring song lyrics for this one.

So, I'm opting with

Two of Us Can Do Anything

Hurts Not Much When You're Around

This one right here I think probably sums it up best:

Sacred Simplicity You At My Side

Then there's this:

Sailed Seas.  Met Storm.  Found Harbor


Okay, now enough of the cop outs with song lyrics.  I should think of something completely original.  Shouldn't I?  


Well, you know what?  I've got nothing.  I got up, made myself a snack, refilled my water bottle and brainstormed; but I'm at a complete loss.  I can't blame the kids for this either because they're in bed.  So there's no nagging or whining or banter to distract me.  There, is, however, a complete and utter lack of ideas.

I'm loving that last one.  I think I'd just go with that without the hassle of creating something completely original.


Hmmm...when thinking about my memoir, though, I'm at more than a bit of a loss.  I know, once upon a time, I came up with a few ideas, but, as I've already ranted, life has a way of stomping the hell out of creativity before it has a chance to be preserved.

One thing that popped into my head was this secret which was once featured on Post Secret.  I loved it.  I saved it.  I posted it in my house.  I admit that I've always hoped it was written about me.  I don't actually believe that, but a girl can dream.

So, using that as a jumping off point, I might go with

She's Trying To Save the World

Another one just popped into my head inspired by recent rants.

So Many Ideas Not Enough Time

And here are a few random ones:


I Freaking Love Sleep.  Unrequited Love.


Don't Die Before Seeing the World!


You Forget That I'll Kick You


Like My Dreams Better Than Reality 


There's So Much More To Learn


Chasing the Sparks In the Ocean


I Need Stories More Than Food


I Am The Legacy Of Many 


Short Weird Chick Never Shuts Up.


I'll Make My Own Damn Cape.


Hmmmm....and, perhaps, one inspired by Hemmingway,the man who, arguably, started this all.


For Sale.  Baby Shoes.  Well Worn.  


What say you?  Anyone else care to get in on this?  If you had to write your memoir in six words, what would it be?  If you had to describe your childhood, religious views, parenting, love life, etc. in six words, what would you write?

Girl Scout Cookies Renew My Faith In Humanity

and not only because Samoas are so freaking delicious.

Did you know Girl Scout cookies are kosher?  Did you know my big girls are Girl Scouts? Did you know that you can buy Girl Scout cookies from them?  Well, now my entire neighborhood knows.

Today, they set up a table in our yard and danced and paraded about on the corner as advertising.  They wore their sashes and jumped up and down while screaming, "Buy Girl Scout Cookies," while holding a skirt as a pom pom in one hand and a box of Thin Mints in the other.

Everyone got in on the action.  The baby held a box of cookies and jumped up and down yelling, "Cookies.  Cookies."  My son paraded up and down the street with a tutu on his head yelling, "Girl Scout Cookies."  A number of people told us they stopped because they saw him and he was just too cute.  So when cars passed, he frowned and said, "They didn't stop.  They must not think I'm cute."  Oy vey, that boy!

At Hebrew school, he charged into all the teacher's rooms and implored them to buy cookies.  He then told me repeatedly that he wants to be a Girl Scout too.  Oh hun, I don't think so, but you sure do make a great salesman.  

The big girls did a great job and they had a lot of business.  I was super impressed.  When a middle school girl walked home across the street, the kids yelled to her to buy cookies.  I explained that kids might not have the money to buy cookies, but wouldn't you know it, she stopped home and then came right to our house with her wallet and was the kids' first customer.  The UPS guy delivered the girls new L.L. Bean backpacks (on which I got a FANTASTIC deal) and then bought a box of cookies.  An EMT stopped and gave the kids a $6.50 tip.  I was actually surprised by how many people donated extra money.  The girls had a ton of sales in just an hour.  They were so proud of themselves.  I am too.  I'm also thrilled with everyone who came out.  I never dreamed they'd have as many customers as they did.

This has lit a spark in my kids.  Now they want to be out there all the time.  Tomorrow, they're selling at the local Hillel then they're coming home to open shop back up on the lawn once more.

Why yes, my son DOES have a tutu on his head.

And now a word from my daughter

There is very little in the world funnier than what comes out of the mouths of babes (assuming it's not Harry Potter's lego head or a purple marker).  Here are a few gems from my youngest.

Today, she ate the purple marker and was covered in purple ink all over her face and hands.  As I cleaned her off, I said, "Oy vey!"  She then exclaimed, "Oy vey, boy!"  That's my usual exclamation since it's typically her brother who elicits an, "Oy vey!"  I told her, "No.  This time, it's oy vey to you."  So she exclaimed, "Oy vey me!"  

Yesterday, while playing outside with her brother and sisters, she got distracted and had an accident.  When I peeled her wet clothing off of her, I told her, "Even your socks are wet."  She then said in surprise, "I peed in my dox."  Maybe it was the tone of voice, but it cracked me up.

Today, we ran late when picking the big kids up from Hebrew school.  I scooped her up and exclaimed, "Oh holy hell!"  She then repeated me.  So I told her, "You don't have to repeat that." She morphed into a mini Beavis and said, "Huh huh huh Hell."  

Oy vey, this girl!

The (far too many) steps to prepping a house for sale

Our house is back on the market.  After a period with no potential buyers, we took the house off the market in December.  We knew we wanted a new agent (ours was perfectly lovely and a very nice person, but she simply wasn't aggressive enough), her contract was up, plus house traffic apparently slows way down in December.  

It went back up with a new agent (someone my husband worked with when they were both in the military) earlier this week.  

For those who haven't sold a house or who haven't sold a house while children were living there, or who haven't sold a house with children who are homeschooled (and therefore, the parents get absolutely no kid-free time to prepare), or those who haven't sold a house with homeschooled children always underfoot and a spouse 2000 miles away; let me tell ya, it's rough. 

Among the list of things to do to prepare to sell a house:

1. Repack existing boxes (stashed in the biggest kids' room).
2. Open children's closets and see an endless array of clothing and accessories strewn about the floor.  
3. Scream.
4. Remove endless amounts of clothing from children who insisted on leaving it lying all over the freaking floor.
5. Remove all socks from those same children for the same reason (yes, my kids are currently sock-less in Winter.  They deal).
6. Remove all but four pairs of shoes from said children.
7. When said children leave one of those four pairs of shoes lying in the middle of their floor AGAIN, remove yet another pair of shoes. 
8. Look under the big girls' bed.  
9. Repeat step 3. 
10. Move the repacked boxes (which now also contain much of what was stashed under that bed) to storage (which, if you're lucky, a dear sweet friend will let you use her garage for and you will be forever indebted).
11. Call new agent and set a date to meet to sign paperwork and take pictures of the property.
12. When one of the children gets sick, cancel said appointment.
13. Repeat step 11.
14. Step 12 may also need to be repeated depending on the number of children and the season.
15. Pack more boxes.  
16. When you think you're done, look around again and revisit step 15.
17. Repeat step 15 more times than you think humanly possible.
18. Just as that dear sweet wonderful friend is about to show up to help you move more boxes, find even MORE  things to throw in boxes.  These things will most likely be stored WAY up high.  You only truly understand the frustration of this step if you are roughly the size of the Keebler Elf.
19. Repeat step 15.   
20. Profusely thank said friend.  It's only proper if you offer to bow down in homage.  
21. Open cabinets and sort through the things the kids have hidden there and forgotten all about.
22. Clean up anything fragile that the kids stashed precariously in the cabinet so that it fell and broke when you tried to rearrange said cabinet.
23. Replace the caulking on the bathtub.
24. Curse.
25. In an attempt to clear out the coat closet, sort through the mess of coats the kids have tossed on the floor (despite the many empty hangers hanging within their reach).
26. Find a can of interior paint knocked on its side when those children threw those coats.
27. When you struggle to put the can upright, discover a 1 foot wide and about 1/2 an inch mostly hardened pool of WHITE interior paint on your dark hardwood floor.
28. Repeat steps 3 and 24.
29. Text/call the spouse with threats to sell the children on Ebay.
30. Scrape up the paint as best you can.   Beware, this is very messy.  Some will be left behind.
31. Cry. 
32. Vacuum.
33. Spend an entire week clearing out the laundry room that no one has sorted through in nine years.
34. Shout with glee when you find the alcohol you sealed up in a box and stashed back there for Pesach (Passover).
35. You just found tequila amid the hell that is house prep.  Do I REALLY need to tell you what to do next?
36. Now that you have more space in the laundry room, use it to stash the kitchen appliances before pictures are taken (You can wait until you sober up from Step 35 or you can do it while buzzed.  It's entirely up to you).
37. Hide vacuum in the laundry room.
38. Clean kitchen counters.  
39. Clean stove.  
40. Drag vacuum back out and repeat step 32 in the kitchen where all the crumbs have now collected from the counter and stove top cleanings.
41. Move any furniture around to desired placement.
42. At least one piece of furniture will break upon step 41.  When that happens, repeat any combination of steps 3, 24 and/or 31.  
43. a. Mop kitchen floor or  b. have child mop kitchen floor.  If b., repeat 43 yourself after.
44. Clear off the weeks of paperwork that have gathered on the dining room table (and by, "Clear off," I mean stash them on a chair where no one can see).  
45. Have child put table cloth on.
46. In an attempt to adjust said table cloth and find the child simply threw it on over a mountain of crumbs.  
47. Repeat step 24.
48. Remove said table cloth.
49. Hand child a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
50. Repeat step 45.
51. Find the baby destroying something you had already prepared.
52. See steps 3, 24, 31 and perhaps 32 if necessary.
53. Veg out on Facebook for a while.
54. COFFEE!  
55. Repeat any combination of these steps.
56. Toss everything left in a box and hide it under the desk.  
57. Take a deep breath.  You're done 15 minutes before said agent is set to arrive. 

While completing this list, you should also stop often to text the spouse to ask, "WTF do you want me to do with this ('This' should typically refer to CD's, games, video game-themed magazines from the late 90s, boxes and/or electrical cords--none of which have been used in years)?"  You should also include numerous occasions of preparing food.

And yes, this list is based on actual events.  Any resemblance to people or situations is purely purposeful.

The Names, They Are A'Changing.

My son has declared that he has a new name.  So, everyone, say, "Hello," to my son Dinosaur.

Following Dinosaur's name declaration, his big sisters decided they want to be known by their middle names.

Why?  Did they think I didn't cycle through ENOUGH names until I finally called them by the correct one (or gave up and just called the child in question, "You")?

Latkes and music

I want latkes.  Chanukah* is only two days away and I'm already drooling over the thought of latkes.

On Facebook, a friend posted some Chanukah songs and another protested that it's not Chanukah yet.  The first friend pointed out that, if the goyim can listen to Xmas music two MONTHS before their holiday, then we can listen to Chanukah music two days before ours.

I must agree (and laugh).

*There is no one translation from the Hebrew.  Some people spell the holiday "Hanukkah," but I prefer "Chanukah," because it's closer to the actual pronunciation.  It's not a soft H sound.  It's that guttural "Ch" sound from the back of the throat.  Angelica said it best in Rug Rats, "CHanukah!  You gotta CHHHH when you say it." (5:05)

Out Of the Mouths of Babes

Oh the things my children say!  Here's just a small sampling of things they've said recently.

In the car, my son said,

"I'm glad I'm not three anymore.  I was obnoxious when I was three.  I'm not obnoxious anymore.  Now I'm only a little bit annoying."  He paused and added, "No.  I'm just joking.  I'm not annoying at all."

Upon realizing that it was lunch time and I hadn't yet had coffee, I made that announcement.  E then asked, "And you survived?"

Same child told her brother (who tried insisting the plastic wrench was a phone), "No, I will not use a plastic wrench to talk to Daddy.  That is not a way to communicate.  Well, maybe in your world."

My twins are not your ticket to stupid

This, right here, is far too true.

While not boy/girl, I do have fraternal twins who don't look a bit alike.  I've heard all of these and then some.

Some of the lines missing are,
"Your hands are full."
"How close in age ARE they," asked in a suspicious and judgmental tone.
"I could never handle twins."
"Are they sisters?"
"Do twins run in your husband's family?"  Um...that wouldn't matter since he played no part in the releasing of two eggs.


Some of my favorite lines from this clip include,

"I always get pregnant the first time I try.
Great job. Here's your cookie."

"Which one is your favorite?
The one who is not screaming."

and

"Which one is smarter?
I am."

Go.  Watch.  Enjoy.  This clip made my night.  I can't stop laughing at it.

Whenever I Remember Linky Roundup

Okay, I give up on trying to do this on a regular basis.  When I remember, I'll roundup the links I've shared and post them here.

I found this Sparrow Mobile through Cool Mom Picks.  Like the vast majority of the stuff they feature, this is insanely over-priced (I unsubscribed from the newsletter recently even though I've been a subscriber from the very start because the prices are too insane).  The good news, though, is that it can be easily recreated for pennies.  I saved a few paint samples specifically because they were shapes which resembled birds.  So I could just use those and even customize it to the kids' room colors.

Kid Independent is a new favorite site of mine.  They feature lots of handmade items including this super cute owl.  I found a ton of items for the kids' wishlist from their Oddball Alphabet feature.


Facebook's Double (D) Standard on Obscenity was originally posted as a note in response to Facebook's constant removal of photographs of breastfeeding babies.  I shared that note, but, as expected, it was removed.  However, someone copied it and put it up as a blog post so that it could still be shared.

'Nazis': A Word With Deep And Brutal Meaning
'Weekend All Things Considered' host Guy Raz.
     I've been making the same argument for years.  He does it very eloquently.


This Someeard is a little early (Chanukah starts December 1st), but it cracked me up.

Lil Blue Boo's No-Sew Fabric Flower Headband looks simple and adorable.  I want to make a bunch with fabric scraps.


This cartoon about Pacman and twitter cracked me up.

I want to make my son this bow tie from an existing adult necktie.  My boy's all about ties of all sort.


These Seven Tips For Interacting With Kids while photographing them is brilliant.  I LOVE these ideas.  Whether you're a professional photographer looking for tips or a parent who just wants to snap some good shots of your own kids, you'll definitely get great ideas from that article.

I've liked Mattisyahu for quite some time, but just discovered Unique Is My Dove recently. I LOVE the message.

I found a few dresses I would love for my girls. This Cinderella Peasant dress would be adorable with some of the custom fabric she offers.  The striking colors and design on this Sunny Autumn Ruffle Dress are just gorgeous.

My father-in-law makes some gorgeous things with wood.  Unfortunately, I don't want to get/make anything large until we move and settle in, but when we finally do move, I might see if he'll have time to make this super cute doll crib with storage.

This story about a first grader named Katie who was bullied because she likes Star Wars broke my heart.  The hundreds of comments in her support, though, restored my faith in humanity.


As a coffee-loving, internet-addicted, homeschooling mom, I loved this cartoon.

I recently discovered Middle School Proverbs which sadden me and crack me up.  This one and this one are two of my favorites.

I was probably more excited to find an old version of Liz Phair's "Ant in Alaska" than I should have been.

"Well I look at the stars and I know you're under them.
I look at the cars and I know you insure them.
I look at the books and things people are reading.
I know that you've written them too."

It always bothered me that she took out the car insurance line.  It doesn't flow right without it and that line has a special place in my heart too.

While we're on the topic of Liz Phair.  I resisted most of the music on her self-titled album because it was too poppy.  This week, though, I was reminded how much I like this one:

Nerdgasm is right.  Star Wars images made using only type.  This is really awesome.

This guy cracked me up:

I LOVE this funny embroidery on etsy.


Oh look!  More 90s female rockers.  Embedding is disabled, but I watched this video of Juliana Hatfield's Universal Heartbeat  on repeat this week.

This Artichoke Sourdough Parmesan Stuffing is calling my name.  I'm dying to try it (minus any treif).

This article on kids' snacks and calorie counting ticked me off.

My sister sent me an e-mail forward with photos of a groom and his terminally ill bride.  When I checked Snopes, I found it was true and it was even more heartbreaking.  Gorgeous photos, horribly sad story.

This tutorial on making a skirt from a dish towel sounds like something even I could do.

This wacky furniture is too cool.

I needed this reminder on Detours.

I think these poppies are so pretty.

I want the light blue bird bank and the white salt and pepper shakers from Pier 1 so badly.  I haven't set foot in Pier 1 in years, but I think that will have to change.


This "table design" left me wondering, "What design?"  It's just some disposable plates on a table.  I don't see any design there.  Plus that family has the oddest collection of names I've ever heard.

This story, "The Cab Ride I'll Never Forget" brought me to tears.

I'm filing this kid's room away for possible inspiration for my youngest's room when we move.

I like this idea, not for a place card, but for a sign to hang (think first names in a bedroom or last name in a hallway).

On Veteran's Day, I shared, Bumper Stick Patriotism Is No Way to Honor Our Veterans.
From that article,
"During Veterans Week you're going to hear people -- particularly those for whom Veterans Week merely means we're one week closer to the Iowa Caucuses -- tell us to 'Support Our Troops.' And when they do I'd like us to politely ask them to put their pom poms down for a moment. I'd like us to tell them that if you really want to honor our troops you won't use them for an easy applause line, that you won't use them to get votes, or, most insulting to them of all, to divide us into real Americans and fake Americans."
and
"I'd like us to ask them what, other than saying it, are they actually doing to support our troops? I'd like to ask the people who say government's bad what they think of the Department of Veteran's Affairs. When we're fighting two wars, should they get more money or less? And where is that money going to come from -- magic or taxes?"


I thought this name sign was a neat way to use legos.

This XKCD cartoon is funny and sad at the same time.

I want to try making this dog necklace.  I, however, want to try altering it so that it looks more like a Chihuahua.

On Kristallnacht Anniversary, Critical Lessons Remain Unheeded.  November 9-10 marked the anniversary of Krystallnacht, which plays a large part in my Nanowrimo story and our family (my husband's grandmother's synagogue was destroyed on Krystallnacht).

Truly Thankful

People are posting "I am thankful for..." things every day this month.  I've seen some great ones, some funny ones, some flippant ones, and some thoughtful ones.

Thus far, my very favorite one says, "Today, I am thankful for my awesomeness."

:-D

This IS the House You Are Looking For

We have potential buyers coming to look at the house tomorrow.  This has the potential to be perfect timing.  

I'm really done with the whole living apart from my husband thing.  I would really love to move along already.  

Please, please please please PLEASE. 

Help me, Obi-wan, you're my only hope.  

*Yes, I realize the "These are not the droids you are looking for" line was said by old Obi-Wan, but I like the lego version of the young one better.  So :-p to the accuracy sticklers.

**Just FTR, it kills me to use the screwy Star Wars grammar.  I love the movies, but I love grammar too.  

We've got grammar, yes we do.  We've got grammar.  How 'bout you?

A Love Letter to the Medical Community

You won't see this often from me.  I'm not a fan of the whole white coat deity thing.  I prefer to stay healthy and treat things naturally.  I'd much rather avoid the doctor if at all possible (hence the whole homebirth with midwives thing).

That being said, I completely recognize that there are things beyond the scope of the more natural healing (for instance, the child who got stuck during the first planned homebirth which necessitated a transfer to the hospital and a necessary c-section).

After the youngest was sick for a full week (and the rest all eventually followed, including the herder of the goat rodeo), I realized this was one of those times.

Problem is, it would be impossible to make 5 doctor appointments at once plus it would cost a fortune (my 2 youngest have never been seen by our family doctor and would therefore cost us $150 each just for them to walk in the door, not counting whatever it would cost for the rest of us).  And, with the husband having a new job comes new insurance.  Unfortunately, with new insurance does not always come new cards necessary for using the aforementioned new insurance.

Luckily, the magical mystical cards appeared on Friday.  Unluckily, it was Friday aka You Have Absolutely No Chance Of Seeing The Doctor Today Day.

Saturday comes and we're all still sick.  E. seems to be worse than ever.  So I decide that, after Shabbat, we'll all go to the closest urgent care.  That happened today and all is right with the world.

So, now, without further ado, I present my love letter to the medical community.

Dear Medical Community,

I love you.  I might even go so far as to say I "heart" you and I, as a grown woman, don't "heart" many things.

I admit, I'm not generally your biggest fan.  Your practices often baffle me.  You do things that studies have established are not helpful yet you ignore methods used for generations which are shown to work quite well.  I will, however, admit that there are things for which you are very useful.  Strep is one of those such things.

Today, I paraded the goat rodeo in to the urgent care lobby in all of our germy glory and the office manager's eyes stayed firmly in their sockets.   I was surprised when they didn't bulge out upon our arrival.  When she handed me all 15 forms to fill out (no, I'm not kidding), she even apologized.


Nurse cranky pants, I could have done without you.  I get that weights and blood pressure probably isn't the most exciting thing to be doing on Sunday morning, but there really was no excuse for being quite so rude.  My kids were awesome during all that, by the way, thanks for not noticing.  You were miserable and a bit of a pest.  Thankfully, our time with you was brief.  Here's hoping your day improved.  P.S. If you ever come across that big biker dude nurse who used to work here, tell him, I say, "Hi."  That guy rocked.

Doctor Buffy made up for Nurse Cranky Pants.  She walked into the room and introduced herself not as, "Doctor ....," but simply as "Buffy."  I hope I was able to hide my initial surprise that people outside Joss Whedon's imagination actually name their children such things.  Doctor Vampire Slayer, you were wonderful!  You commented constantly on how well-behaved the kids were and how cute they were (you get bonus points for that).  When you found out I was nursing (which YOU asked.  I didn't have to bring it up.  Thanks for that), you made certain any prescription was safe.  I could have made that easier for you if my copy of Dr. Hale's "Medication and Mothers Milk" hadn't gone for a walk somewhere.  Sorry about that.

While the Volde-Mart pharmacist was useless, you, Walgreens pharmacist, win the gold star award today.  You had the same initial issue as Useless at Volde-Mart, but you, Walgreens pharmacist, went above and beyond to solve it.  It took you ten minutes to sort through what the Death Eater seemed to believe would involve at least two full games of Monopoly worth of time to figure out.  We were able to pick up our prescriptions soon after and only pay a whopping $5 each for the ever-loving elixir of hope.  Thank you, Walgreens pharmacist.  I just about love you right now.  It took everything in my power to resist the urge to kiss you, but, as a friend pointed out, we all have strep, so you probably appreciate a thumbs up from a distance instead.

Now, we've all started on our medication and we're all starting to feel much better.  We can, once again, peek our heads out from behind this curtain of illness go out into the wide wide world.  Oh happy day!  We can leave our home without fear of infecting our dear friends (or hope of infecting our mortal enemies).  I wish that we didn't need to rely on such medications, but we are ever-so-grateful that they are there with their magical powers.


From the bottom of my happy little heart (and unscratchy throat), I thank you.

Sincerely,
Me